Its amazing how life goes, how we are pulled in so many directions by so much. Not just by the people we know, or those in our lives, but everything that has to do with life. We are pulled in many directions by our family and what they want, believe in, our friends do the same, teachers, bosses, and everybody else that we come in contact with in some way in life. Even people we have never even met, or may live thousands of miles away from such as the president. Everybody has a pull on us, and everything has a pull on us. As we grow older though, we start to realize what everything means to us, and what all we are going to do. Some of us are pulled into the bad things in life, drinking, sex drugs, smoking and all that which is considered to be evil and bad. However I will say not all is bad, but some parts of each is. Then there are the good things, goals, education, good jobs. All of these things have a pull on us, even though we may not do any or even think of some of these things, we do or have had some thought about each. Sometimes for some of us, as we lose people, faith, or certain push in our lives, we may fall into the grip of some of these bad things. If the missing people, the faith, or push that kept us away from all the bad things in our lives, we may stay in that bad groove and live may go down the drain. Some of us may end up at this point, and continue to make bad decisions, and once we have come to live with that for a time, it may take somethings harsh, or somebody that really cares and is willing to do all that they have to to help us get back into the right track and focus on our goals. Its a part of life, and life goes on, no matter what we choose, where we go, or what happens to us. The ones who truly care, truly love us, and truly want the best for us are willing to stay with us are still around, still check on us, and still do all they can to make sure that all is well with us and actually care about what happens to us.

This next part...well, its up to you on whether you read it or not. I am going to post some on my life, and how I feel about some of the things going on, the people, and the old friends. I.E. - Those ones who either just quit acting like a friend, and those who said "friends to the end," "ride or die," or anything at all like that.

I'm not going to go through my whole life, that would be a waste. But I am going to do just a little prelude to this. I wasn't raised the best, but I grew up independent and learned many things most people, adults, don't even know. I can pretty much take care of myself, and do alot of things others cant that can save me money and stuff. But starting in middle school, I started gaining more friends, both older and newer. Throughout High School, I did pretty well, but it seems like so many of my "friends forever" or "to the end" have disappeared and don't even care enough to even just text me and ask how I am doing anymore. I know most of them have time to spend 5 minutes or so to call and chat for a few, shoot me an email or text, or just anything. I don't as for much if anything, but what has pissed me off more than anything though is the fact that so many of my friends that I have helped out so much and done so much for, it seems lie when I need some help, they are always too busy or they are nowhere to be found. I have cut off helping many of my friends, as they were too busy to help me or any of the above about checking on me, I am now too busy to help those people. If I had received some ind of payment for what I did I wouldn't expect for them to help me when I needed it, but since I didn't, all I asked for was help or care in return. So, I will greatly appreciate all that people may decide to change and do for me now in return, but they do not have long. Unfortunately with all that has been going on, and the things that have been building inside of me, I feel that I am getting close to my breaking point. I am sorry I have to say it like this, but unless something changes soon, I will have to carry out the things that need to be done. I do not agree with the things I have been thinking, but it is due. I always said I would give my life for my true friends, whom I have very few of now...very very few, and my family. And that will be how it goes. If I can't make the other things work out in my life the way I need them to, then I will have to sacrifice myself for the greater good, in order to make things better for my family that cares (even though they will be sad) and my few true friends, whom I now will also be sad. But as I said before, life goes on, and time will heal the pain that is received.

To all who care, than you for reading all of this, and if you send me a reply, or leave me a comment, I will say thank you now, and thank you when I get it. If you have any questions about anything that is here and written in this, feel free to ask...if you have the time to show any care to me.
-Thomas